Different Flowers For Different Occasions

Whether for your mother, sister or girlfriend, buying a woman flowers can be a minefield. Turn up to a birthday bash with a petrol station bouquet of frayed petals and flimsy stalks and you might find yourself wearing the bouquet down the back of your trousers. Take on board this little lesson in the language of flowers, on the other hand, and you will be heralded as a model gentleman.

To say 'sorry'.
It may be the hardest word, but so much easier to say with flowers. The rare blue rose symbolizes peace and being hard to come by will earn you extra brownie points. Daisies are said to cheer people up and mark new beginnings. Hydrangeas represent understanding, tulips and hyacinths forgiveness, and bluebells suggest sorrowful regret. Alternatively, you could give her a guilt trip with a handful of withered flowers, the symbol of rejected love and petrol stations.

Anniversary or Valentine's Day.
Forget-me-nots for true love, constancy and memories. Cacti, despite being prickly, symbolize endurance. Red roses are a little passe but if you must go for them buy one or dozen - eleven red and one white with the white representing your true love. Just be prepared for the question, 'Who do the other represent, you cheating bastard?'

Mother's Day.
Yellow flowers are bright and cheery and symbolize adoration, gracefulness and friendship. Dahlias, elegance and dignity, magnolias, magnificence and benevolence, and violets loyalty.

Grandma's Birthday.
Pink roses sit well with the oldies as they speak of friendship. Purple flowers are often related to royalty and admiration - perfect for the Queen Mum in your life. Irises denote faith and wisdom. A word of warning: dont send Granny orange flowers or chrysanthemums, or worse orange chrysanthemums (orange symbolizez lust! And, well. chrysamthemums are usually put on grave).

Ciao.